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Dating and intimate relationships of women with below-knee amputation: an exploratory study
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Online dating can be tricky at the best of times. “I didn’t want to shout about being an amputee in my Tinder bio” we may get paid commissions on editorially chosen products purchased through our links to retailer sites.
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We do hear about people meeting online and finding their one true love.
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I think of his five profile pictures. He matches all of them. And then… he grins. There, where his two front teeth should be, is a pink gummy ridge. I think back to those pictures: in all of them his mouth was wedged shut. I want to leave right there and then. But I accept the gin and tonic he has bought for me. It was three years ago, when I was 25, that I was out running with my sister on a canal path in east London when I tripped and dropped to the ground, twisting my knee in the process.
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“I didn’t want to shout about being an amputee in my Tinder bio”
Finding love in this day in age can be a challenge, to say the least. So many people looking, so few truly special matches. We live in a world of convenience and nearly everything we do in this digital age is done from our cell phones. As amputees, we go through stages of grief.
Request PDF | Dating and intimate relationships of women with below-knee amputation: An exploratory study | Purpose: This study investigates experiences of.
Finding that one person that you want to spend the rest of your life with can be one of the most challenging tasks. However a lot of the times, it is the amputee and all the insecurities that come along with limb loss that adds that additional barriers when it comes to dating. Body image is probably one of the biggest struggles most amputees go through. Missing a limb only adds to the insecurities we had about our body image even before we had the amputation.
Rebuilding self-image should be part of your daily practice of rebuilding self-confidence while you are rehabilitating in a hospital, rehabilitation centre or at home. Make it part of your routine to check yourself in the mirror. Find what works best to show off your features. If you happen to find yourself back in the dating pool after your amputation, there are a few characters of men and women that you would not have likely come across. Below are some examples of characters to be aware of:.
Many are genuinely interested and curious about your amputation, from how you had the amputation, the reason, what it looks like, what it feels like, and so on; they want to get to know your situation. Some are genuinely interested and some get stuck in feeding their curiosity. These questions can get exhausting after a while and you must ask yourself if dating this person is really what you want. That unintentional ableism can quickly turn into making you feel inferior in the relationship.
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His hair — curly and the colour of Hobnobs — is what I expected. His body — slim and clad in a red tartan shirt — is, too. He wiggles his fingers at me, I wiggle mine back as I approach. I tug at my skirt, ruffle my hair. I hope he likes what he sees. I certainly do. Here, in real life, sitting on a high stool, a half-drunk pint in front of him, I see he matches all of them. And then… he grins. There, where his two front teeth should be, is a pink gummy ridge.
A black void stretching right back into his mouth. I think back to those pictures: in all of them his mouth was wedged shut. I want to spin on my heel, leave right there and then.